You know when you decide to end a job, a lease, or a relationship and you have to tell your boss, landlord or partner? Here are some things to consider when “breaking up.”
1. If there are a few tweaks to the situation that would make you stay, voice them.
Maybe you really like your job but you want to be compensated more for it. Ask for a raise, more paid vacation, better health benefits etc! An employer who would love to keep you will take it into consideration. Same goes for a partner. Some things can be remedied. Keep an open mind and put in your side of the work.
2. Don’t tell anyone you’re going to quit until you have to.
I say this because if you are quitting a job, your colleagues and boss will discount you the moment they know you’re leaving. Your needs will be less important to them. We told our landlord that we had decided to not renew our lease 4 months before the lease was up and she immediately started trying to set up contractors to make improvements to sell it right away. Hold on! We still live here and we were just doing a courtesy by telling her so early. Our mistake but now fixed after some communication.
3. Always leave on good terms.
People will ask you why you are leaving. Is it really important for you to tell your now-ex-boyfriend that he has bad breath and is a terrible listener? Maybe, but leaving on terms free of judgements and anger will give you a lot of peace. The bottom line is that you don’t want to be there any longer. Is your boss a jerk? Sure, but is your career going to improve by telling him that? Maybe he’ll be in your career circles for life and it’s ok, everyone KNOWS he’s a jerk, you don’t have to tell him. Plus, you may want a recommendation letter.
Remember that saying, “the grass is always greener.” Yes, different situations provide different joys AND different challenges. Think about whether or not the current situation is good for you instead of how great something else could be. That will give you the CLARITY you need to make a decision. If you decide to break the tie, THEN start your excitement and fantasies about future prospects.
What other tips for breaking ties have you learned in your experiences?
